The Woman Botherer

The Woman Botherer is a species of internet creature that exhibits a set of behaviors considered obnoxious by other members of the internet ecosystem.

The Woman Botherer appears to lack a carbon-based anatomy, except for occasional sightings of an erect (or semi-erect) penis, which may or may not be stolen from other creatures.

Common signs that a Woman Botherer is near include incoherent text messages, questions of a sexual nature, and rambling attempts at conversation with no apparent point. Examples include:


“what r u wearing?”

“what would you do to me if I was there?”

Requests for clarification will often provoke a defensive maneuver in the Woman Botherer. As this creature is unable to state a clear goal or purpose, asking for one will render it inert. Refusing to answer its questions or responding in the negative may elicit an aggressive response. However, some Woman Botherers seem to take satisfaction in receiving an aggressive response from its target.

The Woman Botherer seems attracted to displays of femininity, however, it is not especially selective. It has been known to approach women, men in feminine clothing, illustrations, fictional characters, and occasionally, potted plants.

If you spot a Woman Botherer in the wild, you may choose to ignore it or chase it off with loud noises. Attempting to understand its objective is futile, and will lead to wasted time and confusion.

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